It’s all your fault. You make me so mad. If you would have ______, then I wouldn’t have ______. Blame.
We live in a sad society of victims. I should know. I used to be one.
You see if someone else is at fault, we never have to own our emotions. We never have to take responsibility.
It takes a great deal of self-esteem to take responsibility. Shall we say COURAGE…..great segue from the previous post on living wholehearted.
Courage is owning your story. It’s being responsible for your emotions.
Here is why blame is useless, according to Michael Wickett:
“Every human being alive does the very best they can and the only thing they are capable of doing at every moment of their life with the prevailing awareness that they have.”
They might be dumb. They might be hurtful and wreckless. But they only did what they were capable of in the moment.
We blame others for everything that goes wrong, or our poor choices. Why? Because it’s easy. It doesn’t require courage or vulnerability.
If you’re like me, you blame yourself. Often. It’s the same thing as blaming others. This helplessness, this victim mentality leaves us in an unconscious position where nothing can change.
You may have an angry person in your life that loves to blame others for “making” them angry. Wayne Dyer likens this to an orange. If you cut an orange in half and squeeze it, orange juice comes out. If you squeeze an angry person, anger comes out.
No one makes you mad. No one makes you happy.
What’s the goal here?
The goal is self-awareness. The goal is living a courageous, wholehearted life. The goal is self-love.
High self-esteem people are courageous and totally responsible for their own feel good.
Remember the Royal Law (I will continue to remind you) “Love your neighbor, as yourself.”
Doesn’t this seem a bit selfish or misdirected? No. You cannot give away what you do not have. If you don’t love yourself, how can you believe God loves you? If you don’t believe God loves you, how can you give away that love to others?
How do you increase your self-esteem, thus being able to love others better?
“The moment that a person take total responsibility for everything in their life, including what they don’t like, they are in a position of power to change it.” Michael Wickett